The holidays can be a truly joyous time. The activities, the events, the lights, the food, the gatherings… everybody seems to be a little bit more cheerful at this time of year. But if we’re being honest, it’s not all silver bells.
Behind all of that holiday magic is a stressed-out, sleep-deprived mom with forty open tabs on her computer and an exponentially growing to-do list. Double the stress if that mom is also working full-time and only has one measly hour in the day to get it all done.
Being busy during the holidays is pretty much a way of life for moms. We are often the de-facto planners and schedule-keepers of the household. But for many of us, the stress and anxiety of planning and perfecting it all can be too much. We may end up experiencing feelings of sadness, crankiness, and low energy known as the holiday blues.
What are the holiday blues?
The holiday blues are temporary feelings of sadness, anxiety, crankiness, irritability, fatigue, or loneliness that arise during the holiday season. They are very common and can happen to anyone, including those without existing mental health disorders. We usually experience these emotions between late fall and the start of the new year.
The holiday blues are distinct and less severe from clinical mood disorders like clinical depression and seasonal affective disorder.
What causes the holiday blues?
The holidays can be a much busier time than the rest of the year, but being busy isn’t the only reason we experience the holiday blues.
More demands and expectations
As the demands, deadlines, and expectations rise during the holidays, so do our stress levels. There are suddenly more daycare and school events to keep track of, more end of year work deadlines to meet, and more family commitments to honor. As our to-do lists grow, we constantly shift our attention between different tasks while trying to keep up with our existing obligations. Our brains go into overdrive and it’s easy to end up feeling overwhelmed.
The stress of social gatherings
With the arrival of the holiday season comes an influx of invitations to various holiday parties, social gatherings, and work meetups. The anticipation of these social events can be stressful, particularly if we are naturally more introverted or dread the table talk about politics and parenting choices. We might also feel stressed out if we’re the ones hosting, or if there’s significant travel involved to get to these events.
Financial stress
Financial concerns are a major source of stress during the holidays. Everything is more expensive, but the pressure to spend is the same. We want to buy the perfect gifts for our kids and have the most dazzling decorations on the block. Of course, we still have our usual expenses to manage – groceries, gas, childcare payments, etc. Balancing our finances with our commitments during the holidays can contribute to increased anxiety and stress.
Feeling a sense of loss or loneliness
For some of us, there might be a sense of sadness, loss, or loneliness during the holidays. The loss of a loved one or inability to be with them during this time can make it hard to get into the holiday spirit.
Increased societal pressure
The societal pressure placed on working moms during the holidays is, quite frankly, crazy. There is an underlying expectation of what things should look like, how we should act, and what we should do. Not to mention we are expected to do all of this while working our usual jobs. And the stakes are pretty high – not getting things done during the holidays means disappointed kids and excess mom guilt. If you’ve ever forgotten to move the elf for the 21st day in a row, you know exactly what I’m talking about.
Environmental changes
During the holiday months, there is naturally less sunlight. For many people, this can lead to mild, temporary feelings of sadness, sluggishness, or moodiness that can contribute to the holiday blues. These temporary mood changes are different from seasonal affective disorder, which is a clinical mood disorder that lasts longer and is more severe.
Diet changes
Changes in diet, excessive consumption of unhealthy foods, and drinking alcohol – all pretty normal behaviors during the holiday season – can trigger feelings of guilt as we deviate from our normal routines. In particular, alcohol may intensify negative emotions and exacerbate feelings of stress during the holidays.
Poor sleep
Lack of sleep is a big contributor to the stress and anxiety of the holiday season. We often end up going to sleep later, waking up earlier, or both, just to have enough time in the day to finish everything on our list. Poor sleep is well-known to contribute to emotional fatigue and burnout.
Feelings of regret or failure
Some of us may feel a sense of regret or failure as the year comes to an end. We may be unreasonably hard on ourselves if we feel like we haven’t met certain milestones or accomplished goals we set for ourselves. Those feelings can lead to sadness and frustration during the holidays.
8 tips for managing the holiday blues
1. Set healthy boundaries
The fastest way for us to get burned out during the holidays – and at any time, really – is to ‘yes’ to everyone’s requests. It might seem like the nice thing to do, but we’re really not doing our own selves any favors by overcommitting. Maintaining healthy boundaries – saying ‘no’ – protects our time, energy, and wellbeing. It’s fine and completely healthy to acknowledge that our plates are already full and say no.
2. Maintain consistency
The holidays tend to throw off our regular schedules with all the extra commitments and tasks that pop up. Still, it’s helpful to try stick to your normal routine as much as possible. Maintaining a predictable routine keeps us grounded, giving us a sense of control and normalcy in the day. Here are a few tips to achieve this: try to minimize drastic schedule changes, balance new tasks and commitments so they’re not occurring every day, and keep your schedule normal for at least a few days out of the week.
3. Prioritize your wellbeing
Prioritizing our wellbeing helps us manage stress, especially during the holidays. That means getting a reasonable amount of sleep, practicing daily self-care, taking breaks, and being attentive to our physical and emotional needs. Doing activities that promote relaxation, such as mindfulness or gratitude practices, are helpful for managing holiday stress.
— Anne Lamott
4. Consume in moderation
Eating and drinking in moderation, especially alcohol, helps us to avoid the guilt of overindulgence. Guilt is a powerful emotion, and it can easily spiral into an attack on our self-worth. That’s the last thing we need when we’re already stressed out.
5. Set realistic expectations
Setting our expectations too high during the holidays can lead to major disappointment if we’re not able to meet them. The best plan is to be realistic in what we want to accomplish and keep things simple. That involves setting realistic time frames, checking the calendar before scheduling new commitments, and budgeting wisely.
6. Make a budget and stick to it
Speaking of budgeting – you should absolutely set one during the holidays. Setting a budget and sticking with it helps us avoid overspending and additional financial stress.
7. Utilize your support network
If you’re feeling down, stressed, or overwhelmed during the holidays, don’t hesitate to utilize your support networks. Receiving support from friends, family, or professionals can help to lighten the emotional load and make holiday stress more manageable.
8. Limit social media
The constant barrage of perfect family photos and coordinated outfits might not be particularly helpful to see when trying to get through the holidays. We may start making unnecessary comparisons and putting pressure on ourselves to do more. To avoid the added stress, it’s wise to limit your time spent on social media.
Sources
“The Holiday Blues: Professional Tips on How to Cope | Psychology.org.” Www.psychology.org, 10 Nov. 2021, www.psychology.org/resources/the-holiday-blues-how-to-cope/.
““Tips for Managing the Holiday Blues.”” NAMI, 17 Sept. 2025, www.nami.org/blog/tips-for-managing-the-holiday-blues/.
Lawler, Moira. “The Holiday Blues: Causes and 8 Tips for Managing Them.” EverydayHealth.com, 2024, www.everydayhealth.com/emotional-health/holiday-blues. Accessed 12 Apr. 2026.
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